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Whenever two kids are trying to fight each other at school, I sometimes tell them, "Look, if you really want to fight this kid, why don't you invite him and his family over to your house. Then you and he can fight each other in the yard while your families watch and cheer you on." This usually gets them to start thinking about why they are fighting. I tell them that school is my job, and that there is no fighting allowed where I work. I also tell them something that Will Smith's grandmother told him and that I heard him recall in an interview. She said, "Will, truly intelegent people don't fight with their fists, they fight with their words."

Sometimes a kid will say, "Mr. Bowers, my mom told me that if someone hits me, I should hit them back. I ask them if they would bite a dog if he bit them first. Then I explain that their parents don't want them to be bullied around, but they want them to be smart. I tell them, "I think your parents mean that if you are being attacked, then you might have to fight back to protect yourself. When you get hit you have a choice. You can hit back, or ask the person why they are hitting you and try to figure out the problem. Hitting doesn't solve anything.