end of the world

This kindergartener comes to my class with his thumb all wrapped up in bandages and I ask him what happened. He tells me that he cut OFF his thumb. He was carving a pumpkin--go figure. They were able to take him and the thumb to the emergency room and get it sewed back on and the thumb is fine. Anyway, I asked him what he thought when he saw his thumb lying on the table. He said, " Oh well, end of the world. I have no thumb."

Where ya from?

Boy, my school is getting flooded with kids from New Orleans! (That was probably a bad choice of words). It is November and there are still kids coming in. Every time a new kid comes in from "the Big Easy" I introduce them to the other kids who are from there too. It is so cool watching them make friends with each other and with the Texas kids as well. Some have lost relatives and been through so much, it breaks my heart.

Whenever we get a new kid I go through the "Welcome to Texas" routine. First, I teach them how to give a good Texas handshake. I tell them, "When you meet someone new, you should give them a good Texas handshake to show them that you mean business." Next, I see if they can say, "Howdy" and I tell them (in my best Texas accent) that we all talk like this and if you want to make friends, you have to talk like this too. Then I tell them that its nice moving to a new school because it gives you a chance to start over. It gives you a chance to make new friends and be a better student. I also tell them that the first friend they need to make is with their new teacher. Finally, I say, "Be yourself, smile and pay attention and the friends will come to you."

You are a puppy.

Yesterday I saw a kid sitting in the hallway outside his classroom pouting because he was in trouble. I have known this kid since he was in kinder. He has a big sister who I also taught. I have met his dad several times and even called his dad when the kid was in first grade because the kid had been acting so wild in my class. As I wasked by, I suddenly felt a speech coming on:

Hey buddy, you in trouble? (yes) Hey, have you ever had a puppy? (yes) Did he used to poop on the carpet? (yeah) What did you do? (I had to put him on a leash and take him outside.) Did he chew up everything in the house? (yeah) Did you teach him to only chew on his chew toys? (yeah) Is he a big dog now? (yeah) If your puppy didn't learn to go outside to use the restroom and stop chewing everything up, would you have wanted to keep him when he became a big dog? (no) Well, right now, you are your dad's little puppy, and when you misbehave at school, you are just like that puppy, poopin' on the rug and chewing everything up. Your dad wants you to learn to be a big dog and behave at school. Someday you will be on your own and you are gonna have to look after yourself and find a job. Is anyone gonna hire a person who poops on the rug and chews everything up? ([giggle] no) Thank you, have a nice day.

Not on my new carpet!!!

Yesterday, the kinder class had just left, and I noticed a dark spot on my new carpet. AAAAGGGGHHHH!!! I just got that carpet because the old one had been used as a restroom so many times in the past. I hate that! I must teach a fun class if the kids would rather wet themselves than leave the room. It reminded me of the first time a kid had an accident in my room. The kid was a kinder, and he was real embarrased about his accident. I comforted him the best I could. On the inside, I was so mad, but I didn't let him know that, of course. I was so worried that this was gonna be one of those traumatic events that would ruin his life. His spot was cleaned, but if you turned the carpet over, you could still see it. Well, the kid stayed at my school all the way through 4th grade, so at the end of his last year, I showed him the spot and told him that was where he went to the bathroom when he was in kinder. He didn't even remember doing it. So much for the trauma in Drama.